I’ve written this before. Maybe I’ve written it more than twice. But I always feel like I’m fighting the same battles. Again and again. I’m not going go through today’s chapter 9; take 27 event, except that to say it wasn’t about a clear cut sinful issue. Though it did get me thinking.
’cause the thing is I’m tired of dealing with the same emotional crap again and again, and being in the same place with that crap, but I’m not doing anything about it. And the question I’m wondering is: how do I ever except anything to change if I don’t change it? Why do I have this pie in the sky thinking that hopes eventually I’ll just wake up one morning clean without having to do a bit of work? Why do I feel this strongly now; but probably won’t in a few hours time when I’m lying in bed tonight and having a bit of trouble getting to sleep because I haven’t masturbated?
I’m better than this.